My two week Lean-Green-Clean period is complete. All in all, I did really well. My body feels so much better inside — in a way that is more about better quality food going in and less to do with the nine pounds that I lost. Mentally and emotionally, sticking the program provided a much needed boost. The two weeks demonstrated to me that I can, indeed, manage my food and eating in healthy ways. Certainly much healthier than I’d been doing.
I’m so pleased with the results that I’m continuing on, but with, perhaps a little less strictness. Not much, but the occasional carb or small chocolate treat — also occasionally and not in great quantities.
This is a potential slippery slope because I have a very skewed perspective when it comes to food. Part of it comes from not ever being able to totally free myself from the diet mentality. I’ve had it drummed into me so often, and self-drummed it, that carbs are bad. Awful bad. The baddest of bad. So, even when I eat something like half of a whole grain, high fiber bagel – it feels like a cheat. I went to Miami today to see my Phillies play the Marlins. This was a terrific treat for me to see a ball game in person and spend time with friends. I had an all beef hot dog at the ballpark for lunch. Okay, a hot dog isn’t the cleanest food, but can’t I cut myself a break and not feel guilty?
When I get into that diseased thinking, it’s dangerous. It quite often leads to self-disgust and a “well I f#*#ed up today anyway. I might as well keep going” reaction. So a simple eating of something that really wasn’t bad or damaging can turn into a binge.
As I continue on my program, I need to be very aware of the mental aspect of my relationship with food. I need to be able to separate behaviors into their proper descriptions. Eating half of a whole grain, high fiber bagel is not the same thing as plowing my way through a bag of potato chips. A small serving of chocolate does not equate to a pint of ice cream.
Two successful weeks when I’d been struggling for a while have produced much needed clarity. I’d like to build on this even more moving forward.
How’s everybody else doing?
Weighty Matters 
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