A brilliant friend of mine did a continuing ed course for us at work yesterday. In it she told the story of what she does if something about her computer doesn’t work. Whether it’s a software, hardware, internet connection problem or whatever, the first thing she does is reboot her system. Have you tried that? It’s amazing how often it works.
That happens with my smart phone, too. Things slow down, response crawls. An app stalls. I turn off the phone completely for a minute, turn it back on and the problem frequently resolves.
So, the thought of rebooting has been on my mind.
Also on my mind was a dream I experienced last night. Someone I know in town with whom I’ve previously had a conversation about weight loss surgery appeared in my dream as a contestant on the Biggest Loser. I ran into him at a local restaurant with two of the trainers from the show and he told them about my surgery and progress. They invited me to sit down and we chatted some more. They asked me if I could give one piece of advice for anybody losing weight, what would it be. In my dream I said, “Whether someone takes off the weight after bariatric surgery or through the extreme workouts and eating restrictions on your show, everybody has to understand that this isn’t a “sometime thing” and problem solved. Long term success requires a complete life reboot.”
See how everything tied together in my brain?
I know I’ve talked about this before but it’s coming up for me again and it feels like I have a slightly different perspective. This usually means that it requires me to focus on it and reinforce it in my brain. I have said all along that the weight loss surgery is only a tool and the rest of the work is what really matters. Today after both the course and the dream, I need to revise or refine that idea. Actually, now that I’m pondering this in the writing process, I have something to own.
The weight loss surgery is a tool and it is not the reason for my success thus far. I’m the reason for my success. The diminished stomach capacity has provided incredible help by providing physical control that I was never able to adhere to before. I could always eat and eat and eat until the vertical sleeve gastrectomy changed all that. However, I’m the one who decided to have the surgery. I’m the one that makes the good choices about food. I’m the one who has committed to exercise and physical fitness. I’m the one who hit Alt + Ctl + Del on my old ways.
As egotistical as that makes me sound, I think it’s important for me to claim it. Own it and celebrate it, too. One day at a time, often one meal at a time, I have taken back my life from the eating disorder and all of my messed up ways of using massive amounts of food. Sometimes it’s good to step back from the one day at a time lessons in the 12 Step programs and gaze at the big picture. The global perspective then helps me put the individual choices into action.
In my dream I talked about success not being about the single meal or the day’s workout. It calls for us to reshape our lives and changing our entire lifestyle. This journey is not an accelerated, high intensity boot camp. It truly is a life reboot.
Weighty Matters 
Have you ever seen the IT Crowd? There’s a running joke on there about “did you try turning it off and on again?”
Owning your own efforts and progress and successes isn’t egotistical at all, although women are generally encouraged to think and behave so and men encouraged to do the opposite. You have done so much work and it is entirely through your own efforts and choices that you have come so far. And that’s what is so inspiring.
Your comments about “life reboot” suddenly resonated with me. I’ve been in such a morass of depression and anxiety and desperation. I need a life reboot! I need to completely redo how I’m living and how I’m pursuing work and perhaps even what I’m pursuing, because the current ways are not working at all. If you can make the massive changes you have made, surely I can at least make these less-massive yet no less important changes in my own life. See what an inspiration you are? Now I must go ponder ….
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings and progress and backsteps and everything with us. I am so very glad you do.
Skye, I believe in you and your ultimate ability to reboot.
If it helps at all, remember that mighty oaks from tiny acorns grow. (I heard that somewhere but forget the source.). The point is that massive changes happen as a result of a series of smaller actions.
I appreciate you and every person that comes here.