Weighty Matters

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Reboots, Restarts and When Not to Upgrade

I haven’t posted in a week for a couple of reasons.  Physically and mentally, I’ve been exhausted when I get home at night.  I also made what turned out to be a mistake for my computer when I upgraded to Windows 10.  Nothing but problems and, again, I was just too tired at night to figure out a resolution.  Tonight I finally Googled for answers and found out that it’s pretty easy to resort to the previous operating system, so I did that.

Oh, if it was only as simple and uncomplicated to uninstall all of the things that we sometimes take on in our lives, only to find out that they don’t work the way that we need or want them to!  I can think of a bunch of choices I’ve made that I’d like to undo with a couple of clicks and then a restart of myself.

Right now, I feel like I’m fruitlessly and fitfully searching for an upgrade to my eating plan and daily food diet that will magically reboot my weight loss, resolve my cravings, help me make better choices and, just because I feel like repeating it, reboot my weight loss.  That’s the insanity of my head.  When I get a little crazy like that, I have to stop and remind myself that easy does it.  I have to avoid overcomplicating matters and stick to basics.  Eat healthy.  Eat in balance.  Keep working out.  Trust that results will come.  There’s no magic to it.  No big secret.  Eat healthy.  Eat in balance.  Keep working out.

I resolve to stop looking for some incredible, easy fix.  It doesn’t exist.  There is no special upgrade.  Each day I just need to restart on the sensible approach that I know works.  Eat healthy.  Eat in balance.  Keep working out.

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Life Reboot

A brilliant friend of mine did a continuing ed course for us at work yesterday. In it she told the story of what she does if something about her computer doesn’t work. Whether it’s a software, hardware, internet connection problem or whatever, the first thing she does is reboot her system. Have you tried that? It’s amazing how often it works.

That happens with my smart phone, too. Things slow down, response crawls. An app stalls. I turn off the phone completely for a minute, turn it back on and the problem frequently resolves.

So, the thought of rebooting has been on my mind.

Also on my mind was a dream I experienced last night. Someone I know in town with whom I’ve previously had a conversation about weight loss surgery appeared in my dream as a contestant on the Biggest Loser. I ran into him at a local restaurant with two of the trainers from the show and he told them about my surgery and progress. They invited me to sit down and we chatted some more. They asked me if I could give one piece of advice for anybody losing weight, what would it be. In my dream I said, “Whether someone takes off the weight after bariatric surgery or through the extreme workouts and eating restrictions on your show, everybody has to understand that this isn’t a “sometime thing” and problem solved. Long term success requires a complete life reboot.”

See how everything tied together in my brain?

I know I’ve talked about this before but it’s coming up for me again and it feels like I have a slightly different perspective. This usually means that it requires me to focus on it and reinforce it in my brain. I have said all along that the weight loss surgery is only a tool and the rest of the work is what really matters. Today after both the course and the dream, I need to revise or refine that idea. Actually, now that I’m pondering this in the writing process, I have something to own.

The weight loss surgery is a tool and it is not the reason for my success thus far. I’m the reason for my success. The diminished stomach capacity has provided incredible help by providing physical control that I was never able to adhere to before. I could always eat and eat and eat until the vertical sleeve gastrectomy changed all that. However, I’m the one who decided to have the surgery. I’m the one that makes the good choices about food. I’m the one who has committed to exercise and physical fitness. I’m the one who hit Alt + Ctl + Del on my old ways.

As egotistical as that makes me sound, I think it’s important for me to claim it. Own it and celebrate it, too. One day at a time, often one meal at a time, I have taken back my life from the eating disorder and all of my messed up ways of using massive amounts of food. Sometimes it’s good to step back from the one day at a time lessons in the 12 Step programs and gaze at the big picture. The global perspective then helps me put the individual choices into action.

In my dream I talked about success not being about the single meal or the day’s workout. It calls for us to reshape our lives and changing our entire lifestyle. This journey is not an accelerated, high intensity boot camp. It truly is a life reboot.

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