Okay, I exaggerated a bit. The Earth didn’t actually move by any sense of the insinuation, but the number on the scale finally did. Down a pound after well over a week of no weight loss progress. Just that little bit of downward motion further enhanced the serenity I began to experience yesterday. Going through the first stall proved to be a valuable lesson. I learned that I need to not let the old diseased thinking and emotions get out of control. The emotional and mental aspects are as important as the physical if this is to be a progressive, steady recovery.
I’m also taking time to reflect and give myself a pat on the back for not using it as an excuse to deviate from my healthy food plan. I stayed on track and that’s a big plus. Each day that passes with me following my food plan; each meal that I eat mindfully; every positive healthy choice that I make for myself is a great positive reinforcement. These are all building blocks for a strong recovery. I feel strong and confident and those good feelings are growing over time instead of diminishing.
I think I needed to go through the stall which engendered fear and self-doubt to remind myself of how I used to react on diets when things didn’t go my way or when I started eating off of the plan. Fear and self-doubt always arose those days and then swiftly caused despair, depression and self-loathing. That I’ve gone through my first stall, experienced my rockier moments, and still stayed on track to reach a place of strength and serenity is a break through.
Speaking of on track, I’ve remembered throughout every day to input my food, water and exercise into my diary on myfitnesspal.com. It’s been a couple of weeks now. Even though I can’t say that I’ve developed love of this tool, at least I continue to use it despite my love-lack. It really does help me, otherwise I would never know where I was with my daily protein, carbs and calories. I can’t possibly retain the different numbers and percentages in my head.
This week I pledge to focus more on increasing my exercise. My commitment to myself is to take a brisk walk five times a week, whether outdoors or via my in-home walking DVD. I’m also going to practice my Tai Chi three times at home in addition to the two classes I take each week.
With the additional physical activity, the Earth might not move, but I sure will!
Weighty Matters 
Congratulations!
Congratutions, Mary, for hanging tough! You know I’m a recovering addict, so I’m most excited about the fact that you didn’t let the diseased thinking defeat you during the stall. Even after all these years of being clean, every time I pop a beer for someone during a summer party, my brain says “Oh, that looks good!” I’m amazed every time! Addiction has a very long shelf life. So, I think the evil whispering may keep trying to derail you, but all these fantastic steps you’re taking are going to kick it’s butt (you know, tai chi is just slow motion martial arts–you could put it to good use!)
Megan, you’re so right that we need to always be vigilant against diseased thinking. Good for you for guarding your own recovery.
It’s great that you understand tai chi is a soft martial art. Although the current form that I do doesn’t go into depth on the martial arts aspect, when I studied a different form years ago, the teacher always told us whether a particular move was a defense against a strike or a strike itself. Knowing that intention helps me to internalize and remember the moves. In the form I’m learning now, I try to figure out how I would use it if someone was attacking me.
People who don’t know anything about the art tend to underestimate it. I think it’s because many of them do not understand the awesome power of chi, the internal energy. One time the head of the family that originated the original form I studied led a workshop for our class. His chi was so powerful that he made a small brick building tremble with what looked like one slight press of the palm of his hand on the wall.
Tai chi rocks!
Thanks for your comment!
Awesome news! I am trying to learn the once a week scale. I am up 1 pd and down 2 pounds yoyoof for the past three weeks. I have to work through it like gou did. I am glad you see the changes and new habits you have made are working. Very inspiring.
Just keep watching your food and keep moving. The scale will go down like it eventually did for me! Proud of you for making these efforts, Susie!
I’m happy that you’re happy! I’m sure you know this, but I seriously recommend downgrading the number of times you weigh yourself if you are trying to change that number. Once a week will give you a realistic idea of your progress. Once every 3 days if that’s too eXtreem for you. And make sure to always do it at the same time of day!
Anyway, I’m sure you’re well aware of all this, and it sounds like you are well on your way to having the healthy body that you are happy in.
BTW, I am a first time commenter, I hope I haven’t overstepped myself & don’t want to be intrusive. I came here via Jennifer Cruisie’s blog.
Thanks so much for stopping in and commenting. No, you haven’t overstepped. Honest opinions expressed with regard are always welcome!
You go! I’m so impressed with how well you are doing with this.
Yay for you! That’s a tough thing to get through and stay on track. You rock!
Great news, Mary. Tell yourself now, and often, how great you are for working through this.