Weighty Matters

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The Broken Tooth Whine

I broke off half of a tooth today.  Whine.

It doesn’t horribly hurt but I get twinges of pain when I suck in air or let anything hot or cold hit the spot.  Whine.

Apparently a lot of people broke teeth over the weekend.  I didn’t break mine until 10:19 a.m..  They beat me to the phone.  There are no openings at the dentist’s office until Thursday!  Whine.  Whine.

I just paid for the rest of my trip to Hawaii.  I have mentioned that I’m going to Hawaii in February, right?  Gonna cross that one off of my promise list.  I’m counting the days and am so excited.  No Whine.

But I just paid for the trip and now I know I’m look at a charge of at least $1000 to fix my tooth with a crown and even more if I need a root canal.  I don’t even want to think of the way the costs mount up if he can’t fix it with a crown and I need an implant.  WHINEWHINEWHINEWHINEWHINE.

Sorry for all of the whining, but there’s a silver lining in this whimpering cloud.   If I’m writing out my whines here, I’m not eating  over the situation.

Bottom line — it is what it is.  The tooth must be fixed and I’ll deal with whatever must be done to achieve the repair.  I’m not thrilled about the unexpected expense, but it’s not like I’ll have to ration Nat and Pyxi’s dog food to make ends meet.

Thank you for listening!

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Invincible

There’s no understanding how or why a mood or attitude can change so quickly for the better.  Somewhere between the storm anxiety, a mini-meltdown over being behind in my progress for class and the eventual upswing, thanks to lots of consideration and talking things out here, I set myself up for success. Getting through emotional upheaval without succumbing to compulsive eating was a victory.   I woke up this morning feeling downright invincible.

I want to bottle the feeling like fine perfume so that I can spritz myself with it every morning.  (Note to self, Google perfume names and see if someone’s used Invincible already.)

I have just as much work on my plate as I did before; just as many commitments.  I haven’t figured out how to add five more hours to the day or get by with less sleep and still be effective.  Yet, I’m handling it all so much better than I did last week.  To some extent, I attribute this to fewer hormonal fluctuations (I never got a period, by the way.), and an over all better, stronger, more determined attitude.   I deal with the pressures differently than I used to, without running to my “drug of choice” to indulge in false comfort.

I’m going to nurture myself like I would build a fire.  I struck the sparks by choosing to eat to my food plan.  Each time I stay on track, I’m feeding my little flame.  I’m breathing on it to help it gain strength and grow.  Getting in my exercise is akin to stoking the fire with more substantial fuel so the flames can build, sending out even more light and warmth.  I don’t need to go over the top and mass combust or rage out of control.  Steady input keeps me burning bright.

For today, I’m strong and powerful.  I’m invincible.

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Dressed Up, Some Place to Go

Sorry to be away for a couple days. In addition to work, I’ve been in crunch time for a charity fundraising event. Our committee’s worked very hard and tonight’s the night! Last night I also had a Chamber of Commerce dinner to attend. Fun, of course, but less time for personal things.

I posted a while back about picking outfits to wear for these events. A friend loaned me a dress for last night. I have to say it was an NSV kind of night. I think I looked darn good and many people agreed. I received many enthusiastic compliments.

I felt great too, although I had to get over some nerves. I haven’t worn a dress with a hem above the knee in years!

Here’s a picture. I promise I’ll take another one tonight at the masquerade. It makes me feel particularly terrific that I really do see my progress!

20121020-074836.jpg

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Fab Day with Friends

I traveled today.  The last time I flew anywhere was about a month ago and the improvements continue.  I had some observations about space or, more to the point, me in relation to space around me.   Have you ever had someone park their car so close to yours that you couldn’t open your own door wide enough to get in or out of the car?  This particularly sucks if you can’t manage to go into your passenger seat, climb over the center console and gain control of your vehicle.

I am always conscious of this space issue when parking my car.  I’ll give up more convenient parking spaces if the car on my left is too close to the dividing line.  I’m less nervous about it now because I require less room.  If a neighboring car isn’t perfectly centered within the lines of their space, I don’t sweat it.  Even if I can’t open the door the entire way, I can usually squeeze inside.

This got me thinking about space in general.  I’ve spoken before about retraining myself to realize that I take up less space.  I don’t need as much room.  The last couple of days, however, I’m more conscious of how other people react to me now that I’m 115 pounds lighter than I used to be.    Specifically, I’m seeing less reaction.  Even though I’m still heavy, I’m no longer super obese.  When I was at my heaviest, I would stand out even in a crowd of overweight people.  Now I don’t and that means there are less people shooting looks at me with expressions I can easily read — the glances that reveal them thinking, “Wow.  That woman’s FAT.  Hope she’s not taking the seat next to me. ”  That’s the mildest example I can think of right now but trust me, I’ve been the target of a lot of looks that ranged from disparaging to disgusted to concerned.

Now that I’m not as big, my overall size is not as much of a big deal.  One thing I noticed this morning is that I can walk straight down the center aisle of an airplane without having to sort of ease side to side.  Today’s plane was definitely smaller in design than the others I’ve been on this summer.  Even so, as I walked down the aisle I didn’t catch any panic on my fellow passengers’ faces as they worried whether the huge woman was going to squeeze her overflowing butt into the seat next to them.

After the flight, I rounded up my rental car and drove off to see friends.  These folks knew that I’d had weight loss surgery and even how many pounds I’ve lost.  I saw them last Christmas but we haven’t been together since I had my operation and dropped so much weight.  Even though they’ve seen pictures, all of them said that the photographs don’t really show the change like seeing me in person.  Everybody said they think I look fantastic.  Even more important to me than the compliments is knowing that deep in their hearts, they’re truly happy for me.  The emotional support means the world.

It’s important to remember the role played by good friends and family whenever you undertake a major change.  Whenever possibly, surround yourself with people who honestly love you, believe in you, want to support you in whatever way that you need, and are truly, irrefutably, happy when you’re successful.  It makes more of a difference than you know!

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Living a little less Large

I was about to shut off the computer for the night when I realized that I hadn’t posted in a few days!   I’ve been a little overwhelmed by the start of the graduate course I’m taking.  It’s the first time I’ve been “in school” in about 30 years.  I’m out of practice.  It’s a great course so far and I don’t regret enrolling.  I just need a little time to find my balance.

That said, in no way will I allow myself to get pulled away from this blog.  Coming here and exploring my weight loss journey, the issues of compulsive eating, the pitfalls and victories in recovery, and everything else I blabber on about has become essential to my recovery.  I need this more than I needed to log off and go to bed.  So, here I am.  Hi, everybody!

I experienced a very cool NSV yesterday.  For the first time in more than 12 years, I dressed for work in regular XL sized T-shirt — not a 2XL or 3XL.  I’ve been looking forward to this experience for a long time.  I actually bought the shirt more than a month ago, but it was still a little too snug for comfort across the boobs and mid-section.   My 2XLs had begun to look baggy on me.  The shoulder seams on some of them fall practically at the middle of my upper arm.   I’d taken to twisting the hems of the shirts and sort of tucking them under to make them appear a little more neat.

While I was away, I wore an XL shirt for the first time.  It fit, if a little too tightly, but it was black so I could get away with it.   Still, I knew I was close to being able to comfortably wear this smaller size.  Soon, very soon.

On Monday, someone I haven’t seen in awhile comented on how my weight loss progress really shows and how it’s obvious that I’m also toning up.  (She’s a physical therapist and would naturally notice these things.)  The toning comment stayed with me and reminded me that even if the rate of weight loss has slowed a little, the increased exercise also creates positive changes in my body.

Yesterday, when I opened the closet to select a shirt for work, one of the XL shirts I’d been waiting to wear really caught my eye.  It’s a pink and white tie-dyed pattern — funky and fun.  I’ve yearned to wear one of these shirts for years but the Gift Shop never ordered them in 2XL, so I couldn’t.

So, yesterday I took a deep breath, removed the shirt from the hanger, and slipped it over my head.  Sweet and neat, it fit!  I was thrilled.

The positive feeling remained throughout the day.  Everytime I looked down at the pretty pink pattern, I smiled.  NSVs do that for a person.

Even better, when I got ready for work today, I was able to repeat the experience with a second shirt.  Tomorrow’s choice is already decided with a red shirt that has a white diagonal stripe to mimic a Diver Down flag.   I’ll have that on when I stop by the Gift Shop.  I need a few more shirts in my new size.

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Supermarket Shopping

Every weight loss counselor, magazine article, or list of helpful tips I can think of recommends making a list to take with you when you go food shopping.  I was frequently really good at making up my list ahead of time and studiously finding the items on it when I got to the store.  By the time I got to the check out counter, I’d completed the list for sure, along with a dozen other things that I hadn’t planned to buy until I saw them in the store.

Some experts suggest that you “shop the perimeter” first and stay away from the interior aisles as much as possible.  Yeah, sure, the perimeter has the fresh produce, dairy, seafood, meat and  poultry shelves.  Good choices!  However, in my local Publix supermarket, the first department on the perimeter to my right is the bakery, giving one ample opportunity to load up on cake, pies and doughnuts.  Then the scent of baked goods gives way to the aroma of fried chicken when you hit the deli department.  You can avoid that counter if you cut to the left, but you’ll have to withstand the temptation of the wine shelves and international cheeses.

If you’re successful, you can wile away your time in the produce section before sauntering on to the dairy cases.  Speaking of dairy, I don’t think it’s an accident that the refrigerated cookie dough, biscuits, and popping fresh cinammon roll tubes are situated before you ever get to the non-fat Greek yogurt.

It’s a plot, I tell you.  The masterminds who designed the supermarket layout know that they should make us forge a path through pastries before we can fill our carts with ripe berries and good-for-us greens.  By shopping the perimeter, we could completely pass up boxes of cookies, so of course they want to be sure that the slice and bake stuff can grab our attention.

Just in case we manage to stick to our guns and purchase only the items we pre-wrote on our well-intentioned lists, the stores have one more chance to topple us into temptation — the candy racks at the check-out lines.  I can’t tell you how many internal arguments discussions I’ve had with myself over whether that pack of M&Ms or single Reese’s Peanut Butter cup would really be so bad.

These days I don’t do as much supermarket shopping as I did before.   I pretty much make one trip a week on the weekend and that carries me through.  I’ve become much better at pre-planning, making lists, and then sticking to them once I’m at the store.  The lists, of course, are pretty short, but that doesn’t mean I’m not tempted.  I’m just better at resisting.

I walked in today with my list.  I’m part of an organic produce buying club.  This week’s share included a sizeable butternut squash and I was determined to make homemade soup.  I walked out of the supermarket with every item on my list, but not one thing more.

Not even a pack of M&Ms.

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Things Learned on Vacation

After a long day of travel, I got home about an hour ago and wanted to check in and say hello.  I had a wonderful vacation with family and friends.   I relaxed a lot in the warmth and camaraderie, celebrated some NSVs, and either learned or was reminded about some real truths.  I also went on a fabulous whale watching trip and will post some photos as soon as I download them to the computer.

I’m really tired so if my writing is a little disjointed, please forgive me.  I thought it was important to get my thoughts out rather than delay.

As far as the NSVs, I talked about a couple of them in the previous post — the easy buckling of the airplane seat belt and the XL size T-shirt.  I swear, those accomplishments make me grin whenever I think of them.  I had another one yesterday when I went into the pool at the house we rented.  Okay, it wasn’t so much when I went into the pool but when it was time to get out.  I was able to pull myself up the ladder without the slightest bit of trouble.  I also didn’t feel like I might possibly break the ladder with my excess weight.   It clearly could hold me and that alone relieves a bunch of stress.

It seems like every day, or every time that I do some sort of physical activity, I reinforce my new attitude about movement and exercise.  I’ve thought of myself as lazy for so long, that this is somewhat of a wonder.  On Tuesday, the whale watching company wanted us to buy our tickets on site a couple of hours before the 10:30 a.m. departure.  I got up early and was there by 8:15.  The ticket seller gave me directions into town where I could enjoy breakfast.  In the past, I definitely would have taken my car to drive, but I immediately decided to go by foot.  Barnstable Village is a charming place and I enjoyed a brisk 20 minute walk to a little diner.  I ate a small meal that fit my food plan, drank some tea, and then walked back to the boat — another 20 minutes.  Along the way I kept thinking about how I’m not a lazy ass any longer and was truly happy to have done 40 minutes of exercise.

I never made it to a Zumba class.  Other activities interfered with the timing, but I did walk at least once each day.  While my exercise regime might not have been as intense as I’ve been doing at home, I at least moved.

Our accommodations are comfortable, but very simple and we like it this way.  We spent a lot of time relaxing out on the lawn in conversation.  I don’t think I mentioned that it’s quite a large group of us that gathers.  We had more than 70 people around on the weekend, but even after Sunday, there were 20 to 30 of us around.  This makes for a lot of great talking, group food prep, and fun.  The outdoor chairs are green plastic-resin.  For years I have not trusted these things to hold up under my weight, particularly because they’ve weathered some.  For our annual book discussion or any other outdoor relaxation, I’ve always brought out one of the sturdier wooden chairs.  Not this year.  Not only didn’t I fear that the plastic legs would break, but my butt actually fit on the seat!

Foodwise, I’m going to be rigorously honest and admit that I wasn’t great.  I wasn’t awful either, but I definitely ate too many carbs.  In thinking about this today I realized that it was probably a taste of what my life will be like when I’m on a maintenance plan.   Tonight, I’m encouraged by my mindset.  Starting tomorrow morning, I’m back on the losing plan that emphasizes protein first.  This is a huge improvement over previous “diets” where once I veered off, I rarely got myself back together.

For those of you who check out weather reports, there’s a tropical storm heading toward the Keys that could be a hurricane.  In planning my preparations, I realized another benefit to bariatric surgery.  It’s a lot easier to lay in storm provisions!  If worse comes to worse and we lose power, I can get by with some parmalait milk that I could mix up into protein shakes, some cheese wedges that don’t need to be refrigerated, fresh fruit, peanut butter, and fresh water.   I have a backup power system that runs my fridge and microwave, so I’d only be limited to the above if the power outage extended for several days.  Still, it’s good to know that things could be so simple, particularly if we get any storms this season that require a resident evacuation.  For this storm, I fully expect that I can safely stay put!

Some might wonder why it’s so important and helpful for me to note and share about all these things.  All I can say is that doing so reinforces the positive effects of my progress.  It matters that I really focus on and celebrate the accomplishments, realizations and NSVs.  I don’t ever want to take these things for granted or get lacksadaisical about the improvements in my life.  These are things on which to build and steeping myself in the joy inspires me to stay on track and keep moving forward.

 

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Mirror Image

Several months ago I talked about having fat eyes and not being able to objectively look at myself and see my body in its actual reality.  While that’s been improving over the weeks, and I can see the weight loss in pictures and, obviously, feel it in my body, I still carry around a horrible body image in my head.  I’ve always been super critical of my own appearance and, when I was 386 pounds, I had a lot of justification for being critical.

This week, I experienced a huge, wonderful breakthrough.  I was at Zumba class in my tightish exercise shorts and a T-shirt, moving, leg-lifting, crunching and dancing for all I was worth.  Usually, I watch the instructor in front so that I properly (or as close to properly) follow the steps, and because it’s an ingrained habit of mine to avoid looking at myself in a mirror unless I absolutely, positively must.  During one of the songs I glanced at myself and nearly stopped in mid-butt wiggle.

“Oh my God, that’s me,” I thought.  “I look good!”   I glanced at the instructor to pick up the step change and then looked at myself again. Even to my non-objective eyes and horrible body image filter,  I no longer appear as a huge, lumpy, misshaped blob.  I have a waist.  While I’m not half the size I was six months ago, I’ve carved off a hell of a lot of my own mass and it shows.

Almost immediately, the old image issues attempted to rise up, but I purposely squashed them down.  Maybe it was the positive endorphins released by exercise, but I refused to pick at myself and look at the flaws.  Instead, I admired the smaller thighs, that waist indentation, and the ankles that no longer look like I have water balloons inserted under my skin.  I didn’t care that I have some swinging flab under my upper arms.  I was thrilled at the definition of bicep muscle.  Cellulite?  Schmellulite.  My legs and thighs might still be fat, but they’re powerful, by God, enough to keep me moving for 60 minutes of intense exercise.

After this realization, I could have gone another hour.  Hell, I could have flown.   I was so damned happy to see, really see, the positive changes in my body facing me from the mirror.    Even though I’d tallied up the inches and pounds that I’ve lost, the numbers alone couldn’t deliver this impact — the magic moment when I looked and really saw myself — and accepted my body for exactly what it is today, with all of its improvement.

The experience energized me and injected even more pep in my step for the remainder of the class.  There’s a popular song that’s pretty much a Zumba staple, at least they’ve played it in all of the classes I’ve taken.   I know it’s been around for awhile, but I never paid it much attention until I started going to Zumba.  Now it’s one of my favorites.  Given my big realization this week, it’s particularly appropriate.

In honor of clearing up my mirror image, I attempted to embed the video here.  I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, so I’ve included a link to the video on YouTube instead.  The original artists are LMFAO, but I love this version with the very sexy Ricky Martin and the cast of Glee.  Hope you enjoy it.  Hope you take a couple of moments to dance around and declare that you’re also sexy and you know it!

http://youtu.be/JcCtyMSuyHk

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Clothes Encounters

For my writers group meeting yesterday, I chose to wear a cute batik-inspired purple dress.  I bought it many years ago and haven’t worn it in almost that long because it was too tight.  Now it fits me and looks lovely.  The buttons from the neck to the hem don’t gap or pull.  The waist is a little defined.  In it, I actually see the beginnings of a waist line again.  I can also see my collar bones starting to take shape which looked nice in the scoop neck.

I traded out my customer flip flops for a cute pair of wedge heeled shoes.  With every step, the absence of discomfort in my knee was evident.

While I love my casual lifestyle here in the Keys, now that I’ve lost a significant amount of weight, I’m remembering how much I enjoy “dressing up” sometimes.  Slipping into a cute dress and knowing that I look good in it is a definite NSV.  Oh, I’ve worn dresses even when I was my heaviest, but rarely had the mindset that I looked good.  Instead, the most I hoped for was that I looked okay and not like a two legged cow in a shapeless mumu.  I’ve always liked colors in my clothes, instead of relying only on basic black hoping to hide underneath. Now is no exception with bright turquoise, berry, purple and red garments hanging in the closet.

It feels good to put on smaller sized clothes, chosen with an eye to flatter rather than just to fit and cover up the flaws.   I’m doing what I can to make the most of it, too.  Before, all I really cared about with my oversized, flabby boobs was for them to be comfortable during the day.  I’ve lost enough weight that the good bras I bought last week are both comfortable and adequately supportive.  Seriously, the right bra can potentially improve one’s figure a great deal.  I saw it as soon as I tried one of those bras on underneath a shirt I was considering.  All last week, instead of reaching for the thin, most comfortable bra, I wore one of my new ones under my work T-shirts and smiled at the improvement.

Even in those T-shirts, I look better than I did.  The only problem right now is that I’m between sizes.  I can’t quite fit comfortably in a regular XL because of my boobs.  Depending on the shirt, the XXLs I have either fit just a little loosely or are hanging on me like outsized sacks.  Sometimes I even need to borrow a style twist from the teen set and knot the hem of the shirt so that it fits better and more neatly.   That will do for now, but I already have three shirts hanging in my closet in the next smaller size.  Every so often, I try one on and know that it won’t be long before I give up the larger ones all together.

Thinking of all this earlier today got me thinking about my measurements.  I haven’t redone them since early February and was curious to see how those numbers have also changed.  More than the weight loss affects my body shape and size.  The increased exercise has an impact too.  Eventually, I’ll also have to deal with pounds of sagging skin, but for right now, the reductions of inches are pretty cool and there isn’t a part of my body that hasn’t changed.

I’m pretty sure the numbers I’m about to share are pretty accurate.  It’s harder to measure yourself than it was when my friend helped back in early February, but I’m not going to be too picky.  Here goes:

  • Waist – down 5 inches.
  • Neck – down 2 inches
  • Bicep – down 2.75 inches
  • Forearm – down 2.5 inches
  • Chest – down 5 inches
  • Hips – down 8 inches
  • Thigh – down 6 inches
  • Calf – down 2.5 inches

No wonder I’m wearing significantly smaller sizes and clothes that were once snug are now baggy.  It will be interesting to see how many more inches melt off by the end of the year!

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Sizing Things Up

I didn’t post yesterday because it was a full day with travel, doctors appointments and then fun with friends.  I also absorbed lots of info and have been musing over different things which will almost certainly show up in future blog posts.  🙂

The first appointment yesterday was at the pulmonologist’s office.  I promise not to veer off into a rant, but I hope the doctor’s office staff, i.e. the young woman behind the reception desk, learned this simple lesson in customer/patient service.  When the office makes a mistake in scheduling a patient’s appointment, do not be snotty to the patient.  Instead, do your best to be cooperative and helpful and again, not snotty.

Ok.  Moving on.  The doctor was somewhat amazed at my progress.  We talked things over for a bit and came to the mutual decision not to repeat the sleep study quite yet.  As much as I would love to get off of the CPAP machine, I agreed not to rush things.  By waiting a few more months I can lose additional weight which increases the chances of my sleep hypopnia resolving.  The doctor says there is a 70 to 80% chance that this will happen, but that leaves 20 to 30% chance of it not.  Rather than do the test now, get less than optimum results, and then have to repeat it another time anyway, we’re going to wait until the end of November.  That way I at least get the repeat in on this calendar year when my deductible is already satisfied.

From that appointment I proceeded to my surgeon’s office.   The surgeon and P.A. are used to seeing quick results in patients who have weight loss surgery.  While they were not amazed, they were still very pleased and enthusiastic, and they congratulated me on working so hard.  I chatted for a while with the P.A. and see where I need to make some adjustments.  I’ve been veering over into a few more carbs than I should eat.  I know I can be more vigilant on that score.  Honestly, they really were excited about the dedicated effort I’m giving toward exercising.

*******Alert of Possible TMI********

I spoke with both the P.A. and the surgeon about the way that my system stalls.  We talked about solutions.  I didn’t know that it’s possible for one’s body to develop a dependency or a resistance to laxatives.  Did you?  Anyway, they suggested using Benefiber or a similar product three times a day — mixed in my protein shake or in soup or even water.  I can also use Miralax.  I need to make sure that I consistently drink at least 60 ounces of water and/or low sugar juice a day too.  The hydration is important for a number of reasons — keeping my system regular and flushing my kidneys since I’m still ingesting 6o to 80 grams of protein a day.

All in all it was a good check up, albeit with the cautious reminder to keep doing what I’m doing because, even though I’ve made great progress, I still have a long way to go.

A short time after the second doctor’s appointment, I met up with a group of friends for a delicious dinner at a favorite restaurant.  Everything served is made from fresh ingredients and cooked to bring out the flavors while maintaining lower calories and fat.  The meal was delicious and the company great fun.  A good night all around.

Today I planned to shop.  I have reached the point where I can’t avoid buying some new clothes.  Seriously.  I was down to about four tops that I could wear outside of work.  Remember when I shopped my closets and found garments that had been too tight on me for years?  Even most of those clothes are now too big.  I’m not complaining.  It’s a great problem!

I’ve also reached the stage where my bras don’t fit.  For a while now I’ve been hooking them on the tightest row and they still gap.

I should point out that shopping is not my favorite activity.  I know plenty of people who view it as recreation and who love to spend entire days in malls browsing, going in and out of stores.   I’m not one of those people, but I geared up and got going.

Lane Bryant advertises that they’ll professionally measure you for bras, so I went there first.  No surprise that I’m down two sizes in my bra band size, but not in the cup.  The nice young woman gave me some suggestions on what styles might best suit and I took it from there.  Let me tell you, it’s true what many say.  The right size and style of bra can not only change your body silhouette, it can change your freaking life!  I picked out four and each one fit and made me look terrific.  What a difference!  As a bonus, today LB had a buy one, get the second for half price.  I got four bras for the price of three.

There were good sales going on all over the store.  Plus, every year around this time, Florida designates a week where clothes, electronics, and some other things can be purchased without paying sales tax.  It’s supposed to help families better afford everything students need to go back to school, but adults can also benefit.  Let’s just say that I took advantage of the sales to stock up on smaller-sized panties, cute tops and a purple sundress.  I can’t tell you how great it felt to realize that sizes I used to be too big to fit into are now larger than I need!  Everything I purchased is smaller than I’ve been able to wear in years.

The staff really went out of their way to be helpful.  One asked if I’d received any coupons in the mail.  (I might have but didn’t remember.)  “Do you have Internet access with your phone?” she asked. “Google Lane Bryant coupons.  We have some now that give you $25 off of every $75 you spend. ”  Bonus!  While I did not go crazy with my shopping, let’s say that I qualified for truly spectacular savings.

After an hour or so in LB, I went on my way to a much bigger mall in search of some new makeup and cross-trainer sneakers for Zumba.  A couple of young women who are friends met me there and we wandered for a few hours.  Yes, hours.  After stops in Bath & Body Works for delicious smelling concotions to add to my bath water, and then Sephora for make up, we made our way to JC Penney.  Their mother, who is also a friend, has worked for years for JCP so the girls are very familiar with the store.

I believe I’ve mentioned here before that I have not shopped for clothes for myself in a regular department store in the last few decades.  It’s been at least 20 years, possibly 25.  No lie.   My friends guided me to the Woman’s Department, which was huge.   I will admit to feeling a bit intimidated by the different sections  with rack after rack of clothing.  Friends, maybe I was already tired from the shopping that I’d done before, but I got a little overwhelmed.  Before it got to be too much for me to handle, I managed to find two cute tops and try them on.  Standing at the cash register, I was truly proud that I’ve lost enough weight to shop in a department store.  By this time next year, it will probably no longer be a novelty and I won’t be confined to the Woman’s Department.  Woot!

The only non-successful part of the outing was my footwear search.  Unfortunately, the stores stocked mostly running shoes.  I wanted cross trainers that have a smooth circle on the sole that enables you to smoothly pivot and turn.  So, I’m back to searching online.  All things considered, this was not a big deal and everything else was just so terrific.

By this time, after around four to five hours, I was exhausted.  I wish I’d worn a pedometer because we walked a lot.  By the time I said goodbye to my friends and got to my car, I ached in the small of my back and my right, weaker knee.  On my way back to the hotel, I made a quick trip into Whole Foods to select something yummy from their prepared food “bars” for dinner.   When I returned to my room, I could easily have curled up on the bed for a quick nap.  Instead, I pulled on my bathing suit and headed down to the swimming pool.

Yes, as if walking all around a big mall for a few hours wasn’t enough exercise, I wanted some more.  I swam 20 lengths of the full size pool which worked out some of the aches.  A ten minute soak in the hot tub eased the rest.

As I type this out, I’m freshly showered, pleasantly tired in mind and body, and really, really happy.  Sizing everything up, I’m delighted with the way my size is going down, not only in my physique but in the clothes that cover me.  I’m pleased with my attitude about exercise and my daily recommitment to eat healthy.

It’s been a great weekend for me and I plan to build on this experience for continued success in the future.

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