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Sep 14

Like Riding a Bike

by Mary Stella

You know that old saying when you try to do something you haven’t done in a while? “It’s like riding a bike,” they say, meaning that once you know how, you don’t really forget.

I put that theory to the test today. Literally. I just bought myself a brand new bicycle! It has been at least 15 years since I rode a bike. I know that because I haven’t ridden once since my mother passed away and that’s coming up on 15 years. It might be closer to 20 years, but who’s counting. Clearly it’s a lonnngggg time.

As you know, my doctor and I want to incorporate even more vigorous exercise into my activity. The challenge is how to do more in my already busy days. I already know I hate the idea of going to a gym. There aren’t additional Zumba classes held at times when I’m not working. I can do more at home, but it just seems to lack a little of the oomph I need. So, I’ve been thinking of bike riding which would be good with my weaker knee, fun, and it’s also something that I can incorporate into other activities by just allowing for slightly more time. For example, if I give myself an extra 15 minutes, at least that’s what I’m estimating, I can ride my bike back and forth for Tai Chi classes. On a night after work when I’m not committed to something else, I can take a bike ride. I can even do so and still also take the dogs for a separate walk. We’ve already established that Nat and Pyxi do not like to keep up quite the pace that I need for cardio.

We have a good bike shop in town, so I stopped in today to check things out. I was honest about my long hiatus from bike riding and what I wanted it for. The guy was great and showed me different models that he thought would suit. “Want to take one out for a ride?” he asked. “Sure,” I answered and wheeled out the door. “If crash, my health insurance card is in my wallet.”

Honestly, it really was like I’d just done it yesterday. I immediately found my balance and tooled around the parking lot, confidence growing with every spin of the tires. We adjusted the seat height (Boy is that a lot easier to do than it was when I was a kid.) and I took another test. That quickly, I was sold.

The new bike is beautiful! Sturdy, simple, well-designed. Bonus — I got it in light purple! The bike shop owner was attaching my accessories (lights, bell, water bottle holder, rack for removeable basket) a little while ago and now I’m going to pick it up and ride home. Planning to be smart about this endeavor, I bought a helmet too.

The next phase of fitness has begun and, in this case, spinning my wheels is a good thing!

******************
So I took my bike out for a spin this evening. I need a little practice because my balance is fine but my steering is a little wobbly. I wasn’t confident when passing someone on the bike path. I sort of overcompensated. I might have crashed, um, closely investigated a hedge. No fall. No harm done. 😜

Body Matters My Progress NSVs

3 Comments »
Sep 12

Don’t Be a Boob – Get a Mammogram

by Mary Stella

Okay, one more post and then I’ll stop harping. (Okay, I might harp one more time when October arrives since that’s Breast Cancer Awareness Month.)

First off — I’m fine. I went in today for the spot compression follow-up. Again, no pain even though the tech needed to compress a little more. We did the image and the tech asked me to wait while she consulted with the doctor. Five minutes later, the doctor came in to tell me that everything was okay. It’s a benign calcification and they’ll see me next year. Boo-to-the-maximum-yah!

The takeaway lesson for me is, no matter what, go for the annual mammogram. I got the all-clear, but if this had been a malignant tumor the fact that I get my regular screenings would mean that it was pretty early stages which only increases my survival chances. So, whether previous ones have been painful or intimidating or embarrassing or what, please go.

Stepping down from the soapbox.

Thank you all so much for sharing your experiences and offering your support and encouragement.

I have to say that when I left the hospital after my test, I experienced two “signs”, or what I choose to interpret and receive as signs from the universe. I got in the car, and turned it on while I texted the “all-clear” message to my bosses, sister-in-law, and friend who knew I was going for the test. The song playing on the radio was Live Like You Were Dying by Tim McGraw. You know what, even though I do not currently have a life-threatening disease, this song is a universal message to make the most of every day, not put off the things we want to experience and to make sure we love deeper and sweeter with the people we cherish.

It occurs to me that when I let my super obesity severely narrow my life experiences and activities, I was more living like I was dying. That, my friends, is no longer acceptable. Now I will continue to seek out the experiences I’ve put on my Promise List, mark them done, and keep adding to the List.

After I texted, I put the car in reverse and looked around before backing up. Parked a little behind and to the right was a tan Chevy El Camino. Chevy stopped making these cars in 1987. They’re basically station wagons (Remember those in the pre-SUV era?) with a truck bed instead of back seat and luggage area. My father got his first El Camino when I was 14 in 1972. It was a comfortable ride, like a car, but gave him the cargo space to tote fishing rods, the dog boxes, etc. Daddy taught me to drive in that car. He liked the models so much that he replaced that first one with another sometime when I was in college and drove it until his death in 1983.

You don’t see many of them on the road today. I always smile when I do. I think I’ve mentioned before that Daddy’s medical specialty was radiation oncology. So today, as I left the hospital after getting the all clear on my mammogram, seeing a car like one of his was like getting a little nod from him. It was almost like a confirmation from him, saying, “You’re okay, sweetheart.” Fanciful thinking or not, I’ll take it.

Body Matters General Musings

4 Comments »
Sep 11

Doughnuts are Not Medicinal

by Mary Stella

Okay, gang, I’m mildly freaked-out about something. That reads like an oxymoron, but what I really want to impart is that I have a slight nagging concern emotionally, while logically my brain is saying don’t borrow trouble and odds are everything is fine.

Here’s the thing. I went for my mammogram on Monday, as you know, and had a great experience. I figured in a week or so I’d get the “everything’s fine” letter. Instead, I got a call yesterday from my doctor’s office to tell me that the radiologist identified something called a microcalcification cluster on my right breast. I need to go in for a spot compression to provide additional views.

Mentally, rationally, logically, I know that this happens all of the time and the odds are really, really good that this is not a big deal. Emotionally, of course, I’m going, “Oh my God! I might have breast cancer!!” If you drew me into a cartoon yesterday, there would have been giant letters in a horrified font with a dozen exlamation points. Then I took a deep breath and texted my sister-in-law to see if she had a free moment. She’s a nurse practitioner, experienced in women’s health. I explained the situation to her. We agreed that it was way too soon for me to freak out. She promised to do some additional research.

I wasn’t wound up like a tight spring all last night, but it’s a good thing there wasn’t a handy one-pound bag of M&Ms anywhere around. No sense in tempting a compulsive eater with a favorite drug of choice during an emotional time. A good friend reminded me that women really do get called back for further screenings all of the time that end up being nothing malignant. I slept well and this morning, my s-i-l called me back. It seems that most of the time, these microcalcifications really do turn out to be nothing of concern. She told me that after the spot compression, even if they were pretty sure there wasn’t a cause for concern, they might still want me to have a biopsy procedure just to be completely sure.

Having this information prepares me and, in the long run, helps me remain more calm. I’m working toward a state of “don’t borrow trouble, all will be well, no sense worrying until there’s something to worry about”. Honestly, I’m a lot better than I was yesterday.

The thing is, when I hit an emotional upheaval like this, it triggers me to want food. Whether I’m home or out driving in the car, it’s like I still think I need the food to calm myself down. I have to work through the process so that I don’t compulsively eat. That’s when I remind myself that doughnuts are not medicinal. Candy is not a sedative. I do not need cake to soothe me.

Instead, I need to breathe deeply, do some Tai Chi, take the dogs for a walk, sit on the porch, talk to loved ones. Those honestly help me where food is only a false remedy.

I got for my follow up test tomorrow morning and will probably hear on Friday if anything further needs to be done. I’ll keep you posted. In the meantime, please say it with me, “Doughnuts are not medicinal.” 🙂

Body Matters General Musings

8 Comments »
Sep 9

Pain Free Mammogram!

by Mary Stella

I have a couple of NSVs today. First the one of lesser significance. It’s the first full week of the regular football season. As I write this, my Philadelphia Eagles are battling the Washington Redskins. I’m wearing an Eagles T-shirt that I bought for game days a few years ago. When I got it, I ordered a 3X so that it would fit comfortably. It still fits comfortably, but as a nightshirt rather than a regular T-shirt. Seriously, the shoulder seams hit me at the middle of my upper arms and I could step outside my house wearing only the shirt and not worry about compromising my modesty and flashing the neighborhood. That’s how big the shirt hangs on me now.

I kept it instead of getting rid of it in my clothing purges. It comes in handy as extra sleepwear some nights and can also serve as a bathing suit cover up. Mostly, I just want to hang on to it until I get around to ordering a new Eagles shirt to support my team. Booyah!

The second NSV is brought to you by the letter M, for Mammogram. Given the area of my body that got screened, maybe the topic should be brought to you by the letters DD.

I’ve always been good about going for my regular mammo screenings, even though I hated going when I was my fattest. For one thing, it’s embarrassing to not be able to close the wonderful hospital gowns. What’s more, my upper arms were so big, that the tight sleeves practically cut off my circulation. Then there’s the whole challenge of placing my boobs on the machine and, positioning me correctly in other ways. My large size made the process really difficult for the technician.

Oy, the pain! Older machines called for significant boob compression to obtain acceptable images. My flesh always needed to be compressed even more so that they could get a good read in spite of the fat. Mammaries mashed between the plates, I held my breath and thought of England. Okay, I held my breath and tried not to whine, moan or whimper. It wasn’t the tech’s fault that I was so uncomfortable. I knew she felt bad and didn’t want to make her feel worse.

My friends, I am here to tell you that today was an entirely different experience. Not only am I 170 pounds lighter than I was the last time I had a mammogram (Yes, I’m a few months overdue.), but the hospital upgraded to a new, digital imagine machine! I don’t know if it was all because of my smaller body size or a combo of less flesh and better technology, but the boob compression didn’t hurt at all and it was a lot easier for me to position my arm and the rest of my body. In a much shorter amount of time, the tech was able to obtain clear, good images of my breasts, and I was able to breathe without crying.

I don’t have results yet, of course. The images must be looked at by the radiologist. Honestly, I don’t anticipate a problem. Although a first cousin on my father’s side of the family developed breast cancer in her 40s, that is the only family occurrence that any of us know of. I’m able to self-check much more reliably these days and I haven’t felt any lumps or anything else. I’m a few months overdue, but it’s not like I’ve ignored regular screenings for years. So, I’m sure in a week I’ll get the letter that informs me everything’s okay.

In the meantime, I’m so happy that the experience was so positive. It’s another check in the plus column for losing weight and living a healthier lifestyle. I have my annual appointment in a few months with my primary care physician who also does my pap tests. At that appointment, I’ll be able to tell her that I am officially post-menopausal. It’s now been a year and a half since my last period. Booyah! I know that my doctor will now request that I have a bone mineral density test. She suggested I have one after I turned 50, even though I was still menstruating. I couldn’t because, unfortunately, I was beyond the weight limit for equipment for that test at any of the diagnostic centers in a 100 mile distance of home. No such problem now! Are three Booyahs in one post too many?

Next month, October, is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Have you had your annual mammogram? If not, please schedule your appointment and go. If you’ve gone, please ask your friends and family members if they’ve been screened. If not, encourage them to make their appointments. Tell them from me, that today’s improved equipment doesn’t hurt, but even if it does, they still need to go. Enduring a little pain now may save their lives later.

Body Matters My Progress NSVs

4 Comments »
Sep 1

Dangerous Curves Ahead

by Mary Stella

I don’t use this blog to promote books and I know that this post is going to break that guideline, but I can’t help it. I just read a novel that really speaks to every insecurity I’ve ever had or continue to have about my body, how I’m perceived, and how it all relates to guys and relationships. The book is a romance novel called Dangerous Curves Ahead by author Sugar Jamison. I might not ever have heard of it, except that one of my BFFs, Beth Ciotta, talked about it on her FB page. I’m so glad that I did!

The lead character of the book, Ellis, is fat. She refers to herself as fat throughout the book. In most areas of her life, she embraces that she’s overweight and it doesn’t get in her way. She’s given up her career as a lawyer to open a clothing store for hard-to-fit women, whether they’re overweight, taller-than-average, or whatever.

I love Ellis. She broke off a two year relationship with a man she’d fallen in love with because she realized that that in everything he said and did, he tore her down. He mocked her, belittled her for her weight. he tried to make her feel fortunate that he was with her because what other man would love her at her size? She hears this from him and from his creepy aunt and she knows that it’s bullshit. She refuses to accept it and dumps him.

However, it still affects her or, rather, the perception and treatment of overweight women affects her. It infuses her with a deep, powerful insecurity when she is faced with the reality of a relationship with a handsome, sexy, detective. She works hard to keep Mike, the detective, at a safe space apart from her. She resists getting involved with him physically and battles like a warrior to protect her heart. She’s positive that he will eventually dump her because great, attractive guys don’t really fall in love with fat women.

She’s nervous inside about a hundred things – like sitting on his lap, or being in the superior position in bed. On some level she is surprised every time he treats her with genuine affection and attraction. Throughout the book you experience how deeply she’s impacted by her weight insecurity, even when she’s a champ in all other areas.

I wanted to cheer her on throughout the story. I wanted to hug Mike every time he told her not to degrade herself because of her weight. I wanted to pulverize the ex-boyfriend and his aunt, Ellis’s bratty sister, and this bitchy random woman for all of their anti-fat bias, meanness and cruelty.

I haven’t talked a lot about my dating or relationship history here on the blog. It’s pretty dismal. At some point in this journey, I’m either going to seek out or run across an opportunity to date. I need to not be wrapped up in the past when that happens. I guess I should drag it out and examine it here. Not today, but someday.

Clearly, based on my own experiences, I emotionally invested in Ellis overcoming her insecurities and other, external struggles, to win her happily every after with Mike. She deserved it. We all do.

I applaud the author Sugar Jamison for this book. In addition to the heroine’s internal conflicts touching me, I also loved the book for the voice, all of the characterizations and Ellis in particular with her wit and humor. I’ll definitely read more by this author.

Body Matters My Progress

6 Comments »
Aug 27

Taking Nothing for Granted

by Mary Stella

I haven’t been to a Zumba class in to weeks because of meetings, renovations to the place where classes are held and then my vacation. I looked forward to tonight’s class ever since I got home from my trip. After work, I took the dogs for a walk, fed them and then went to the bedroom to change into workout clothes. When I balanced on one foot at a time to pull on my exercise shorts, I flashed back to two years ago.

Getting dressed was a challenge. In order to pull on underwear or a pair of pants or shorts, I either had to sit down or I had to hold onto a bed post or table for steadiness. Even with that support, I still need to bend down as far as I could to drag the clothes on over my foot. Putting on sneakers was even more difficult. The easiest way was for me to sit on the bed, bend my leg at the knee and prop it on the bed too so that I could reach my foot. The other option was to again sit in a chair, bend over and sort of contort myself to get my sneaker on. I can remember a time when I had to pause and suck in a breath so I could finish tying the laces.

***** Before I forget, I need to digress a minute. Someone asked me why I share these memories of the way that I used to be when I was at my heaviest, most awkward self. I do it because it’s important that I remember what it was like. It also matters to me in case there’s someone reading who is struggling with morbid obesity. It helps to know that someone has lived what you’re experiencing and understands. I hope it also helps to know that things can be better. *****

Okay, back to the topic. Tonight I changed clothes with balance and ease. Putting on my sneaks was a simple as crossing one leg over the other, slipping on the shoes and tying in a few seconds. No stress or strain, no struggle or shortness of breath. In that moment I thought, “As long as I live, I will never take this for granted.”

I then grabbed my water bottle and hand bag and bopped out the door. Millions of people do this every day without giving the ability a thought. It’s just normal for them. Now it’s normal for me too, but I will never forget the days and decades when it wasn’t.

Zumba kicked my ass tonight. Even though I’ve been doing Tai Chi, brisk walking and that 7 Minute Workout, I could feel a reduction in my ability and endurance. I pushed on through to get the most benefit from the exercise, ignoring the internal whimpering. When we finished the cool down and stretching period, I picked up my water bottle and towel, said goodbye and made my way to the car. For a second I slumped in the seat and just felt the gratitude sweep through me. I thought again, “I will never take this for granted.”

I need to appreciate every day, every pound lost, every time I walk or dance or move with control and balance through the 108 moves in the Tai Chi set. I want to remember the times that I say no to eating the wrong thing and yes to healthy choices. It’s all hard work and I’m grateful for the willingness to put in the time, energy, effort and determination.

Recovery is precious. It also isn’t automatically permanent. I have to keep nurturing my progress, reinforcing the healthier practices, and maintaining my determination. I don’t want to lose what I’ve fought so hard to achieve so I can never, ever, take it for granted.

Body Matters My Progress

4 Comments »
Aug 25

90% Mental, The Other Half Physical

by Mary Stella

Vacation is officially over and with it my brief foray into eating too many carbs and veering from my food plan. I am focused on my goals and absolutely excited about doing what I need to do to attain the desired weight loss.

I’m about to put together my lunch and snacks for tomorrow. That tip about measuring out even the mid-morning and mid-afternoon snacks is a great one. It protects me from mindless eating. One cannot eat food that isn’t accessible! I have some of my yummy kale soup on hand for dinner tomorrow night. In fact, I’m good through Tuesday because I have a lot of leftover grilled rib eye steak around too.

I did pretty good this weekend on getting in my exercise. Thankfully, my cold quickly moved through my system. The chest congestion that clogged my breathing on Friday eased up that evening and was virtually gone by yesterday. Yesterday morning we had a three hour extended Tai Chi class. We didn’t do the moves for the entire three hours, but even if I generously factor in the big and small breaks and the time when we observed the instructor, I think I can claim at least 90 minutes of movement. Today I not only did the 7 Minute Workout, but I also did my half hour brisk in home walking program (30 minutes of approx. 4 mph). After dinner I walked the dogs for about 25 minutes.

The title of today’s post comes from an old Yogi Berra quote. If you don’t know Yogi, he’s a baseball institution. A terrific player, with multiple MVP awards, appearances as an All Star, World Series play and awards and also a manager. Over the decades of his career, he also became known for “Yogi-isms”, funny messed up pieces of advice and commentary. The actual quote goes something like, “Baseball is 90% mental. The other half is physical.”

It strikes me that the same can be said of my weight loss journey. Yes, I know that 90% and 50% add up to more than 100%, but sometimes I need that extra effort. I can’t split the necessary elements of physical and mental into even halves. Eating right and exercising are half the battle, but they aren’t possible if my head isn’t in the game and, very often, I need to be borderline obsessive about the mental preparation and consistently psyching myself up for success. Sometimes it feels like all that I do is think about food, although the thought process is different. When in the grip of my compulsion, I’d think constantly about food, specifically what I had, when I could get some, how much I had around me to eat, and what foods I craved at any point in time. Now I have to think about having the appropriate foods in the appropriate amounts and then think about when it’s time to eat those foods. It’s also important to think about food when it’s not time for me to eat, so that I can stand firm against impulse, compulsion and “mental hunger”.

It really does sound 90% mental. I’m okay with that. 🙂 If focusing on this aspect of my journey keeps me on track, then I will wholly embrace it. It doesn’t really throw me out of balance. After all, I can do some of that 90% thinking while I’m also involved in the 50% physical efforts.

Body Matters General Musings My Progress

2 Comments »
Aug 24

Reducing Self-Criticism

by Mary Stella

I’m going to post a really crappy photo.  That’s not a judgment of me.  The quality of the photo is crappy because I took it of a mirror image of myself in low light with my phone.  Here goes:

Mirror picture

Sorry for the lousy quality of the shot, but I didn’t think of this blog post topic until after I was already home from the community function I attended this evening. If I’d thought of it sooner, I would have had someone else take a decent shot. Anyway, onto the reason.

I bought this dress and found the hot pink shrug when I went to Ross some weeks back. I loved the colors and the fit and thought it would be great in my wardrobe. Plus it was on sale for a ridiculously low price which fit with the overall plan to not spend a lot of money on clothes while I’m still losing. When I tried on the outfit in the store, I almost didn’t buy it because the sleeves on the shrug are sort of short and my upper arms are really showing their flab and wrinkly, saggy skin. I do not wear sleeveless tops. Most of the time, if I’m around other people when wearing a bathing suit, I also wear a sun protection shirt or rash shirt. Some of that is to guard against excess sun, but mostly it’s because I don’t like how my upper arms look.

Even though I was unhappy with showing too much upper arm, I still bought the dress. Ever since I’ve looked for a pink shrug with longer sleeves, but I haven’t been successful with that quest.

Tonight when dressing for the event, I almost selected a different outfit, but the colors and pattern on this dress made me smile and I really really wanted to wear it tonight. I put it on and drew on the shrug. Honestly, it was like all I could see were my arms and I wasn’t happy. I looked straight on, then to the side. I even went to a couple of different mirrors. It felt like my upper arms flashed a message that said, “Look at us! Look at us! We’re hideous. Look at us!”

I was thisclose to taking off the dress and putting on my second choice, but all of a sudden I got really pissed off at myself. I see plenty of women down here wearing tank tops, bathing suits, or sleeveless outfits with upper arms that are much larger than mine. Trust me. Their arms aren’t the first thing I notice, and when I do it’s never with the thought of, “Holy crap. That woman has arms like a ham. She’s brave to go sleeveless.”

Nah. I only direct that sort of thinking at myself.

Before I could change my mind and my outfit, I said the hell with it and walked out of the bedroom. I was going to the event in this outfit, short shrug and arms be damned.

From the time I picked up my boss/friend to the moment we left, saying goodbye to people we knew at the event’s end, I didn’t hear one negative comment or see anyone recoil in horror. All I heard were compliments on how pretty I looked, how great I looked, how much someone loved the outfit — all 100% positive. If anyone noticed the part of my upper arms that showed beneath the shrug sleeves, they didn’t mention it. I’m pretty sure that nobody cared. If they gave it any thought it all, it might have been, “Wow, she’s lost so much weight, she’s a little saggy in some places.” Honestly, I think the only person it was an issue for was me.

I didn’t worry about it at the event. I certainly didn’t obsess. Instead I just enjoyed myself, hugged a lot of friends, spoke with several acquaintances — you know, all that regular interactive stuff people do at such events. It was a fun evening.

On the way home I took a few moments to bask in the afterglow of the compliments. That’s when I thought of using the experience as a blog post and decided to take a photo when I got home so you could all observe and give feedback.

My takeaway message from all of this is that even now, I am my own harshest critic and when I think negative thoughts, it’s a good indication that I’m not being objective. I can do better. Moreover, I owe it to myself to keep working on reducing this form of self-criticism. It serves no healthy purpose. I can foster much more positive reactions to my changing, evolving body and build on them for the future.

Body Matters General Musings The Past is the Past

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Aug 23

Recipe Calculations

by Mary Stella

As I anticipated, I woke up this morning with too much chest congestion to go to Zumba class.  😦  I slept in a little, had breakfast, caught up on a few things and, eventually, went out to do a few errands.  Since Monday, when I was disappointed by the Portugese kale soup I had up on Cape Cod, I’ve had the proverbial bee in my bonnet to make kale soup on my own.  I’ve had some potential ingredients rolling around in my head so I decided not to search for recipes on line.  Instead, I decided to wing it and see if I could invent something tasty and nutritious all on my own.

I already had the kale that I bought at the farm market yesterday and a couple of containers of low sodium vegetable broth here at home.  At the supermarket I picked up a large onion, a large rutabaga, some fresh thyme and some chorizo.  I partially cooked the cubed rutabaga and then added it to the pot in which I was lightly sautéing the chopped onions. I sliced the chorizo into half circles and then let it cook in with the veggies which gave everything more flavor and some color.  After rinsing and patting dry the kale, I tore the leafy goodness off of the ribs and gave it a rough chop before adding it to the pot along with the broth and a couple of cans of drained/rinsed cannellini beans.  I tied up two bundles of thyme, stirred them in along with some black pepper and brought the whole concoction up to a full boil.  After a good stirring, I reduced the soup to simmer for 90 minutes while I went out and cleaned the pool.

When I came back in, the house smelled terrific.  There is something special about a house infused with warmth and the aroma of a pot of deliciousness simmering on a stove.  I am delighted to say that I guessed right on the ingredients.  The slight smoky heat of the chorizo married well with the slight sweetness of the onions and rutabaga.  The thyme provided another layer of flavor that sparked up the kale and beans.  All in all, I give the flavor of my creation two enthusiastic thumbs up!

Taste is one thing, but I wondered about the nutritional value of my new soup.  I went online and found a site that calculates the nutritional numbers for recipes if you enter the ingredients.  According to that site, here’s the breakdown for my Kale & Rutabaga Concoction, based on a one cup serving size.  (Although I rarely eat an entire cup.):

Calories-210; Total fat-4.7g; Saturated fat-1.7g; Cholesterol-9.4mg; Sodium 631.1 mg; Potassium 83.9 mg; Total carbs 31.6g; Dietary fiber 7.4g; Sugars-4.5g; Protein 11.6g.

In the grand scheme of things, this soup fit in great with my total daily numbers.  Although I’d love to reduce the sodium even more, I don’t get much sodium in other foods, so I’m okay for the day.  The fiber from the beans helps to reduce the impact of the carbs and I’m really happy about the protein grams.

Isn’t it cool that there are ways to calculate the values of recipes that we create?  The internet is such a terrific resource for helpful information.  I’m half tempted to revisit the site and type in the ingredients for my famous brownies.  Then again, maybe I don’t really want to know the truth about those particular treats. 😉  For right now, I’ll be happy to have the number for my soup.  I’ve already entered it as a food in MyFitnessPal so that I can call it up easily any time I serve some up.  The overall recipe made a lot.  I have a container in the fridge that will feed me at least three more times as well as three additional containers in the freezer for coming months.

In other news, as the day went on I felt better and less congested.  I started getting antsy from lack of exercise.  Even though cleaning the pool took some energy, after drying off a bit and testing the soup, I figured I’d give that 7 Minute Workout a try.  I love the app I found for my phone.  It not only provides the timing for the 30 second exercise periods and 10 second rest intervals, but it also gives the user a head’s up on which exercise comes up next.

In the interest of honest disclosure, I cannot perfectly do all of the exercises on this workout.  I sort of suck right now at jumping jacks.  I need to do the slightly easier versions of the pushups and planking.  Frankly, I can’t correctly do the side plank either.  However, I gave everything my best shot for the full 30 seconds and I improvised on the exercises that gave me trouble and made them as challenging as I could.  When I was done the 7 minutes, believe me, my heart rate was up and my body knew that it had worked.  I think it provided a good pop of intensity and exercise to the day.

Coincidentally, I had the Dr. Oz show on this afternoon.  One of his guests was Chris Powell, the trainer from Extreme Weight Loss.  They were tackling the problem of people who are doing their best to diet but who aren’t seeing the results.  Chris pointed out how many people think that they’re eating less than they are in reality.  He provided the basic calculation for the basal metabolism rate.  (Your current weight X 12 = Number of calories you burn just in living every day.)  He also offered great suggestions on how to cut back, how to use your hand to estimate the right serving sizes of protein, veggies, carbs and fat, and explained something to the audience that I blogged about a while back.  Keep the snacks at 100 calories and measure them out into small bags or containers so that you plan, have what you need available, and know that you’re not eating too much.

He and Dr. Oz also demonstrated a five minute exercise boost that mixed low intensity with high intensity in 30 second intervals.  Basic steps that you can do anywhere.  I can’t see that the five minutes burn too many calories, but it was further evidence that it can be helpful to incorporate these short periods of exercise into our busy days.   They add up!

All in all, I’m feeling good about getting myself back on track.   There are roughly 19 weeks left in the year.  My goal is to be down another 20 pounds by the end of 2013.

Putting everything into the mix, I’m confident that I can do this, based on my calculations.

Anyone else have a goal they’d like to share?

Body Matters General Musings

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Aug 12

Feeling Graceful and in Control

by Mary Stella

When I was my heaviest weight and my right knee was its weakest, I always felt so damned awkward.  I hated feeling like at any minute I could overshift one way or the other and simply lose my balance and have to catch myself with a hand against a wall or stagger my feet.

Doing anything the least bit physical took extra effort.  It’s a good thing that I’ve always been pretty strong because I’ve had to compensate a lot for the extra pounds.

In addition to the weight loss providing a general, overall improvement, I’ve been studying and practicing Tai Chi for about 18 months.  This has been a huge help.  As my body size reduced, my leg strength increased.  Gradually, my balance improved.  I’m more flexible.  My knee is greatly improved.  I have much better control over my movements.

I can feel it when I do the moves of the Tai Chi set.  We pay attention to weight shifts, the way that our hips move, the rotation of our bodies around our spines.  The instructor reminds us that there isn’t any momentum in Tai Chi.  Moves are done with intention.  Our arms don’t just flop around or our feet fall where they may.   For example, if I start with my weight all on my left leg, raise my right leg for a kick and then place the right foot back down, I don’t fall forward onto that right foot.  Instead, I put it down to the floor in an “empty” step, meaning no weight until I deliberately shift forward.

It takes control, balance, flexibility and strength, particularly when we slowly proceed through the 108 moves of the set.  I’m so much better at it than I was 18 months, a year, or even six months ago.  My joints are much more flexible.  I can pretty much pivot a full 180 degrees now, which demands cooperation from my ankle, knee and hip.  Even my right knee agrees.  Trust me.  It was not participating in that full pivot when I first began.

I’m one of the three most experienced students in the class now.  All three of us take turns serving as “set leaders” for the instructor.  Tonight, I was in the front left corner.  This means that I open and close the set and establish the pace the class is supposed to follow.  When everyone’s facing “front”, they follow my timing.  When the moves turn us in the other direction, we follow the set leader in the back right corner.

There are many beautiful series of moves throughout the set.  One of my favorites is called Wave Hands Like Clouds.  We repeat this move in three series (five times, seven times, three times) throughout the set.  Tonight we also did extra practice on it to work on the timing of the side steps, coordinated with the movement of the arms, moving our shoulders and hands, shifting weight from leg to leg.

After we were done practicing that section, before we realigned ourselves to do a full set for the end of class, the instructor made a point of telling me that he could tell I’ve worked on the move.  “You were very graceful, with a beautiful flow,” he said.  That was high praise indeed.

It made me think of all of my movement, whether doing Tai Chi, walking the dogs, climbing in or out of the boat, or just getting up from a chair.   Nothing’s a struggle.  I’m in control.   I no longer feel like a lumbering bear, but envision myself moving with strength and grace.

When I was younger, my parents used to tell me that I carried myself well.  Finally, after many years of not experiencing that anymore, I once more believe it.

Body Matters My Progress

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