I want to thank you all again for your thoughtful suggestions, comments and support. I value the input you provided and have a plan.
Have to admit that the emotional impact of the doctor’s appointment and “cut more calories” suggestion stayed with me. Okay, it’s still with me today. Yesterday, I decided to give myself permission to say, “Screw it” to my food plan. No, not long term. I do not want to give up my healthier lifestyle. I just needed a day to not worry about eating any carbohydrates, enjoying a glass of wine, or eating a freaking cookie.
Last night was the holiday boat parade in my city. This sails right past my home and I usually have friends over. This year, I invited some close friends for dinner. I’ve said before that I still enjoy cooking and no cooking makes me happier than Italian. The smell of a good tomato sauce simmering on the stove delights my senses and makes my mouth water. I love mixing up a batch of meatballs to go with the sauce. Knowing that the friends coming over particularly like my Italian meals simply made me smile as I chopped, sautéed, seasoned, tasted and put everything together. The end result — a big bowl of meatballs, sausage and penne in sauce with crusty Italian bread and salad on the side. For dessert a plate of cookies and biscotti.
I’m sure between the preparation and the actual meal, I ate more than I would normally. I didn’t gorge on pasta but had some penne and some bread and a couple of cookies. All told, I ate less than half what my friends consumed. Strike me down, diet gods, I also had two small glasses of red wine.
We ate on my porch in the glow of my twinkling holiday lights. My friends savored the food I’d cooked. I experienced the time-honored joy of feeding people I care about. One couple’s three year old son entertained us with his energy and adorable “Wows!” whenever another brightly lit boat passed. It was a beautiful, fun, relaxing evening and I enjoyed every minute of it. Of course I made a huge amount of food so I packed up two generous “to go” containers and sent most of the leftovers home with my guests. I kept some meatballs and a little bit of penne for myself. Today I don’t even care so much about the pasta but I’ll enjoy the meat and sauce. I can always run up to Publix and get a spaghetti squash as a substitute.
With all of the cooking yesterday, I didn’t get in my full 10,000 steps. This morning I woke up to a beautiful day and immediately went out for an hour-plus bike ride, followed by a 15 minute dog walk. By the end of the day I’m sure I’ll exceed 10,000 steps. I will not overindulge in a pity party but will keep myself in good check with my eating.
I’m not going to cut my calories to 600 per day. There is not part of me that thinks doing so is a healthy choice. We’re heading into the holidays. I will be out of my normal routine for several days. While I would love to lose more weight during the rest of the month, I’m setting very simple goals: Maintain my current weight and keep exercising. When all is said and done, I’m going to be fine. No, I’m going to be better than fine.
Whether it takes me six months, nine months, or all of 2014, I am going to reach my goal weight at some point in 2014. On that I would never say screw it. I am absolutely committed to this goal and I will make it.