Weighty Matters

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Weight Loss Weariness

on February 28, 2013

Jumping on to blog before work because I woke up this morning in a strange emotional place.  For some undefinable reason, this morning I am tired of being on a weight loss food plan.  I’m drinking my freshly made protein drink (fresh, organic strawberries, almond milk and protein powder) which tastes good, but in between sips I’m glaring at it like it’s some noxious medicine.

Considering my options for lunch, I stood in front of the open refrigerator regarding all of the options with disdain.  Just for today, hell, just for right now at this moment, I feel like I don’t want to be on a “diet” any more.  My motivation switch is in the Off position.  I’ve been on this effort now for well over a year and most of that time have ridden an incredible high.  Even at the end of the cruise when I tasted pretty  much whatever I wanted, I still had the motivation to be physically active and get back on track when I got home.  Today I feel like I’ve tumbled down from that high big time.  I know that I still have more than 70 pounds to go.  I’ve lost more than twice that amount, for pity’s sake.  It’s not an unsurmountable target.  It just feels that way today.

I guess this is normal.  Ebb and flow, high and low.  It happens.  That doesn’t mean I have to like it.  This is not a comfortable state of being.  It’s also unacceptable.

I’m not done yet.  I don’t want to be finished, content with my current weight when I’m still carrying 70 more pounds than I should.  The weight loss and fitness have triggered so much wonderfulness and I want to to continue enjoying every bit of it.

I don’t even particularly want to take a break.  The more that I stick to the program, day by day by day, the sooner that weight will be off and I can truly transition to maintenance.  Plus I’m going to a convention in two months where I will spend most of a week hanging out with friends — many of whom I haven’t seen since last April.  I’d love to be even 20 pounds closer to goal by the time that I leave.

My motivation hasn’t died.  It’s just hibernating this morning.  I need to wake it back up, focus on the long range goal but remember that I can only get there in the future if I take care of business today.  The good news is that I chose to come here and blog about it instead of making inappropriate food choices.  I could have taken a bagel out of the freezer and fixed that for breakfast.  Instead, as I have morning after morning after morning, I made a protein drink.  I have healthy choices packed for lunch and snacks at work.  I know what’s on the menu for dinner.  I’ll be fine.

Even if today I don’t like following the food plan, I’m going to follow it anyway.  In the end, even though I’m weary of the effort, I still want to meet my goal more than I want to stop.  That’s all that matters.

Thanks for listening.

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6 responses to “Weight Loss Weariness

  1. Perhaps the jet lag kicked in so strongly because your body’s been through so much change. Motivation right now is jet-speed scrolling like a slot machine trying to find its lined-up rest point. You’ll get back to steady motivation — meanwhile, gotta be a comfort you stayed on the diet path. Huzzahs!

  2. Hope says:

    *Hugs*

    You can do it!

  3. Skye says:

    I think it’s great that you blogged about how you felt, and then went ahead with your meal plan instead of kicking it to the curb. A very healthy way to handle it. As my therapist has been trying to drill into my head lately, how I feel does not have to determine what I do. There is more than one option. Just because I feel like doing nothing doesn’t mean that’s what I have to do. Well you have that concept mastered! I hope your attitude returns to normal today!

    • Mary Stella says:

      Thanks for the support, encouragement and hugs. I’ve gotten through the day do far without veering from the plan. Now I’m off for a mani-pedi that always makes me feel great.

      One day at a time!

  4. Susanne says:

    Hang in there!!! You’ll get over this slump. It’s just temporary. You’re not superwoman. We all have our ups and downs.

    I love your attitude. Without putting undue pressure on you, your attitude is inspiring 🙂 I find anyone’s story about reclaiming their life inspiring.

  5. One foot infront of the other… One day at a time. Keep up the great work!!!

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