Weighty Matters

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Losing a Person

on October 13, 2012

I’ve had an exhausting two days.  I’m enrolled in a special leadership program that has monthly sessions/activities until April.  Yesterday and today made up the first session.  I learned a lot, met terrific people — my classmates for the next several months — and participated fully in all of the discussions and activities.  We had a blast today.  After a full morning with an expert speaker who talked about negotiating, relationships, leadership styles, etc. and had us doing really interesting activities, we took off for lunch as a group.  After that, we were split into groups of four or six and sent off in electric cars around Key West on a fun and funny scavenger hunt that mixed finding clues from existing points of interest and provided challenges where we needed to stage entertaining photos and quickly email them from our phones.

After two jam-packed days I’m definitely wiped.  I can only imagine that I’d be flat out miserable and would not have enjoyed the weekend nearly as much if I’d never lost weight and started getting fit.  I’m ready to go soak in the tub, read for a little while and go to sleep early.  That said, there are a few other things I learned over the weekend that I wanted to share.

One of the important self-care techniques I’ve learned since my surgery is that I cannot leave my food and nutrition up to chance or up to anyone else’s timing.  Although our meals were included, I still made sure to bring snacks that I could eat if we had too much time between our planned meals.  Thank goodness I did so.  These got me through in good shape.  I have also learned that it’s okay for me to mix up what I eat when.  I didn’t know ahead of time that we had refrigerators in our rooms, so I didn’t bring protein shakes.   Today included a full breakfast buffet so I was able to get eggs for protein to start off my day.  The lunch items offered were grilled hamburgers and hot dogs.  I asked for my hamburger without a roll, had about two tablespoons of potato salad and was quite happy.  I grabbed a bottle of water for the scavenger hunt  Later on, we all joined up at a local bar/restaurant.  Instead of having an alcoholic drink, I asked for a virgin daquiri as a fruity treat.

When I finally got home around 6:30, I wasn’t in the mood for an actual meal.   Honestly, I wasn’t in the mood for much at all.  I had half of a leftover lamb chop in the fridge.  Just that with a half a glass of milk satisfied me for dinner.  See?  Just because it was “dinner time” didn’t mean that I had to come up with a traditional meal.

Last night there was a small reception for us with alumni of other classes.  They offered a few hot hors d’oeuvres. I took a couple of small chicken tender pieces and realizes that I was satisfied.  Almost everyone else was breaking into groups to go out to dinner.  At 8 p.m. I was tired and brain fried.  I opted to go up to my room, change into shorts, t-shirt, and walking shoes and go to the exercise room instead.  I am ridiculously proud of myself for doing 45 minutes on the treadmill!  I pushed myself at a good pace for most of it, too.   This is a good leap for me to prefer to choose an exercise option over eating more and socializing.   I needed a workout of some sort, since I hadn’t done anything aerobic since Tuesday’s Zumba class.  I’m tapped out for tonight, but tomorrow will either be a good day for a bridge walk or I’ll do water aerbics in the pool.

I’ve mentioned to a few people who’ve asked that I’ve lost around 120 pounds.  Some of these people are on the more petite side.  I literally have lost the equivalent of some of my friends and acquaintances.  Even though I’ve logically known this in some part of my brain, it really is mind-blowing.  I feel like I need to apologize to my entire poor body for forcing it to carry around an extra person for so long.

I’m sorry body, with all your individual organs, muscles, bones, tendons, joints, etc.  Thank you for not breaking down completely.  I promise to not abuse you like that ever again.  From here on out I will always treat you with greater care and do whatever is necessary to strengthen you.  We’re in this together, body.  I’m on your side!

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2 responses to “Losing a Person

  1. robena grant says:

    Honoring your body. I like that. And yes, as I’ve gotten older I’m less rigid about dinnertime having to be dinner. My most favorite dinner is a tuna sandwich, or eggs and toast. : )

  2. Skye says:

    It’s cool to see how you can eat within your own parameters and limitations yet still with everyone else at restaurants, etc. You are making this work more and more smoothly and you seem to be more accepting of when things don’t go as planned or in a way that would be best for your meal plans, even when surrounded by activity, other people, and social invitations.

    I also like your apology to your body and your appreciation for all that it’s done for you. I need to do that more, especially the appreciation part.

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