My weight loss slowed a little last month. By that I mean that I “only” lost 12 pounds in between visits to my doctor. Don’t anybody hit me. By any calculation, 12 pounds a month is still a helluva lot of weight. Logically, I know this. Emotionally, I wanted it to be 15 pounds or more. When you eat as little as I do, you expect big reductions on a regular basis.
Allow me to smack myself upside the head for irrational griping.
Ok. I’m back.
The truth is that over the last few days, I’ve gone over my conversations with the doctor and physician’s assistant and realized that while I’ve been “pretty good” about my food plan, I’ve slipped a little here and there. No, I didn’t gorge out on carbs because, face it, I can’t physically gorge myself on anything any more. However, I noticed that I had a little bit of carbs more times than I should have. Likewise, I’m not planting myself face down in desserts and candy, but I’ve rationalized too many small pieces of chocolate or a single cookie with greater frequency than I did when I first started.
Is any of this behavior truly awful and horribly harmful? No. On the positive note, the fact that I’m controlling the individual portions so well is great progress for a compulsive overeater. Seriously. Eating one cookie is a miracle for a person who could chow down an entire box in an evening when on a binge.
So what, you might ask, is the big deal? Simple. I don’t want my progress to slow. Carbs and/or sugar too often slow the progress. So I lose 2 1/2 pounds in a week instead of 3 1/2 to 4. I ask myself, what do I want more — that cookie or small serving of rice or a lower number on the scale?
The lower number wins.
I’ve been obsessing that I can’t seem to get vegetables into my diet on a regular basis. I really do still concentrate on eating protein first. I mentioned this to the doctor and he told that, for right now, I shouldn’t worry about it. Intake of protein and drinking enough water are the top priorities until I get to my goal weight. He understands that it sometimes gets boring and reminded me that when I’m at goal weight, additional food choices will be worked into my maintenance food plan.
All weekend I thought about these things and made a conscious decision to be more careful with my food choices. I’ve realized anew that potatoes, rice, bread, chips, and crackers aren’t all that important or desirable. Results are. Doesn’t mean I can never ever pick up a piece of fruit or sample a fry, but I’m not going to make a meal of them either.
I can already feel and see the results of the new resolve. My body is clearly happier and responding nicely. Mentally, I like that I worked this all out and am pleased with my decision.
Happy body + happy mind = happy Mary.
Weighty Matters 
I am now able to eat more than I could before … up to about 4 ounces per sitting or so. I’m tracking my food, water & exercise using an online program called myfitnesspal.com. I started using it mostly so I could help make sure I get in enough protein & water, but I also discovered I needed to watch my calorie intake.
It amuses me no end that when I started, the idea of eating 1200 calories a day horrified me, made me feel as if I were binging. When I think of where I started and the impossibility of maintaining a diet of as little as 1200 calories vs. now, it just tells me how far I’ve come.
The goal for my age, height, weight, and goal weight loss per week ends up being 1200 calories a day (although mfp won’t apparently let you aspire to more than 2 lbs per week loss). If you exercise, you can eat more — and are encouraged to “eat back your exercise calories”. If you eat 1200 calories, but exercise 600 calories away, you’ve only “netted” 600 calories and that can send your body into starvation mode.
anyway, I got to thinking, I can manage about 1200 calories with my meals & a couple of simple snacks like peanut butter or cheese, but then your fat levels go up.
last night I started pondering ways to create snacks that incorporated proteins but also focused more on vegetables & fruits instead of dairy proteins, or carbs. Not incredibly high calorie foods, but enough calories not to be in a serious calorie deficit while getting some good nutrition in. Calories that focus on protein, on fiber, on good nutrients while being lower on fats and carbs. Not devoid of fats & carbs, but lower ratios. Because last night, as I realized I needed to get in a few more calories, the easiest things to go to were cheese and chocolate. I can get all kinds of extra calories from doritos, and still stay under the goals, but that doesn’t do much for the healthy lifestyle thing, does it?
Not sure what all I’m going to come up with, but it’s a new way of thinking about the food I eat, and I love it that I’m having to try to figure out how to eat MORE, and not necessarily having to worry about it being too much.
Right now, I’m pondering a greek-inspired shrimp salsa kind of thing; almost a shrimp tzatziki with extra veggies & less yoghurt. Something I could eat a few bites of straight off a spoon, or maybe on a couple of crackers, or a piece of cucumber.
I’m putting protein, fiber, veggies/fruits, and low to moderate calories first in this quest for filler food. It should be an interesting experiment …