Thanks to the no-junk-carbs, healthy foods, lots of fluids approach yesterday, I’ve flushed two pounds of the evil water weight out of my body. Two more to go and I’ll be back on track.
In the midst of this I had the “Oh Yeah”, mental head smack, “D’oh!” moment. I really am supposed to eat like this all of the time while I’m still on the reducing phase of my weight loss journey. It’s not like I’ve been awful, playing fast and loose with my food plan, but clearly I have not been as “rigorously honest” with the effort as I thought. In retrospect, I will cop to what I know realize was some form of denial.
I wasn’t bingeing. I wasn’t completely immersed in compulsive eating. I was probably eating more like I will as a “normal” person. Eating well-balanced, healthy meals, indulging with a few treats here and there, but not going crazy to the point where I kept gaining pound after pound after pound.
The thing is that I’m not yet in the phase where this is the way that I should be eating. I still have weight to lose, so I was stalling my own effort. There is a LOT of great news in this realization. Just the fact that I actually can eat like a so-called “normal” person is encouraging. I’ve never been able to do that for a sustained period of time. ***I hate the term “normal person” or “normal eating” but, unfortunately, I can’t think of better, more appropriate terms right now to convey what I mean.*** I’ve now been on this journey for more than two years and, overall, I’m doing great! This gives me enormous encouragement that when it’s time for me to transition to maintenance and the future lifestyle of eating, I’m going to continue to be successful.
This eliminates an enormous fear. Deep in my heart, I’ve been almost afraid to believe that I will not gain back all of my weight. I’ve been terrified that I will revert to the old pattern, the way that I did every single other time I dieted. I am now cautiously learning to have faith and believe that I truly am converting to a person who will sustain life time recovery. These are not just “for now” changes. I’m in it to win it for the rest of my life.
For now, however, I need to maintain the rigorous honesty of my “losing” food plan. I’m fighting back against the lure of carbs and too much sugar. It’s day two of this week’s fight, and I’m committed to success. Tomorrow morning, I will wake up and commit again. Recovery is achieved by successfully living a series of “One Day at a Time” efforts.
I feel lighter today, not just in body, but also in spirit. I was growing weary of the losing effort. Today I am newly inspired.
Weighty Matters 