Weighty Matters

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Booyah is my word of the day. Actually, it’s my word on a lot of days. My assistant at work and I use it a lot to indicate a victory, the completion of a particular accomplishment, or when we’ve had an opportunity to be a little “in-your-face-take-that” in a somewhat metaphorical way to some opponents.

Tonight, I feel all of those things. Tomorrow it will be a full week that I’ve been on this new program. I can already tell that I’ve lost weight. That’s a victory over the stall I’ve experienced and an accomplishment. No matter what, every single one of us should remember that every successful day on a program – whatever that program happens to be – is an accomplishment. I’ve had a string of great days in a row, so Booyah!

Booyah to my eating disorder, too. That’s the “in-your-face” part of my feeling. My eating disorder sometimes acts like an ever-criticizing voice in my head. When I struggle, it says rotten things to me about how I’m screwing up, how I can’t stick to a program, how I’m doomed to regain all of my weight, how I’m weak-willed. Blahblahblahyousuckandshouldadmititblahblahblah. Well, eating disorder, you can take your critical, demeaning attitude and stuff it. I’ve had a great week, despite your effort to sabotage or undermine me so, Booyah!

Every day I stuck to the food plan and did the scheduled exercise routines. These were not easy. I’ve been sore most of the week which tells me I’ve worked muscles that needed the extra effort. I’ve also kept up with twice daily dog walks and daily Tai Chi. Today’s routine involved Pilates. I have zero experience with Pilates but I did the entire routine. I hope that my abs will thank me when they finish cussing me out. In keeping with my experiment to do some of the routines in the evening, I worked out a while after dinner and the evening dog walk. That’s probably why right now I feel particularly strong.

For so many years my body just felt beaten down, tired, and old beyond my actual age. To feel this strong and capable is more than a physical boost. It’s truly an emotional high. I love it!

I’m taking the positive energy experienced this week and bridging it into the next week of effort. I can build this into real momentum and keep chugging toward my goal.

Say it with me now, friends, “Booyah!”

**********Quick Edit************
I weighed in this morning (Friday) since I started the new program last Friday. I’m down 9 pounds! Yes, I know some is the water weight bloat but that’s still significant. So, again I say Booyah! Have a great day!


Incredibly Unflattering Progress Photos

Changing the time when I workout from early morning to after work proved to be a good thing today. For one, I was happy to have an extra half an hour of sleep and still got in a 15 minute walk with Nat and Pyxi. I also got together with the three other co-workers that also practice Tai Chi. We did a set at work at lunchtime.

When I got home from work, I put on my workout clothes and started the DVD with today’s routine which concentrated on the upper body. When I finished, I put together a healthy and tasty meal, using those colored containers for my portions. (Spaghetti squash with crushed fire roasted tomatoes and skim-milk ricotta cheese. Delish!) After taking the dogs out for an evening walk, I settled into the recliner with a cup of hot tea and relaxed. As I hoped, I’ve had no desire to compulsively eat. I know my mindset has something to do with it, but that was greatly assisted by the fact that I’d spent 30 minutes sweating and exerting myself. When one has just done numerous circle crunches and then some crossing twisty crunches, one does not want to pig out and eliminate the benefits gained.

That move wasn’t actually called crossing twisty crunch, but I can’t remember what they were called. They involved lying on my back crunching so that my left elbow went toward my right leg, right elbow to left leg. You get the picture. I will admit that I couldn’t do the full version with required keeping one leg straight in the air with the other out in front, elevated a few inches off of the ground. Still, I worked those abs by trying to make my elbow meet my bent and lifted knee.

Feeling like I accomplished good things for myself while also feeling strong and committed, I decided to go ahead and take some “before” pictures, as urged by the program creator. I’ve taken “before” pictures before, but never while wearing only my workout bra and shorts, leaving upper arms and midriff exposed. Shooting them at arm’s length with my iPhone didn’t help. Warning. These are spectacularly unflattering photographs. I caution you that once viewed, some things cannot be unseen.

Remember — you were warned!

Is it my imagination or is there the beginnings of some ab delineation beneath the remaining  flab?

Is it my imagination or is there the beginnings of some ab delineation beneath the remaining flab?

So why, I hear you ask, would I publicly post ick photos of myself? I’m pretty sure it’s because I’m comfortable sharing all of this stuff — good and bad — with you. It’s part of my process and my recovery.

When I look at the pictures, I realize they aren’t quite as horrible as I make them out to be. Yep, I’m showing some flab, some stretch marks, some baggy upper arms, but so what? Overall, my body shows a heck of a lot of improvement since this photo:

Me at pretty  much my heaviest weight.

Me at pretty much my heaviest weight.

That photo was taken about nine months before my weight loss surgery when I weighed about 386 pounds.

All things considered and compared, I’ll look with pride and happiness at the pictures I took today – including the flaws — and celebrate what I’ve accomplished.

A few weeks from now, I’ll shoot another set of pictures and we can assess my progress together.

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There’s Always Another New Day

Until the day we die, or maybe the day after, we always have a new day in which to restart our efforts and recommit to our goals. The only thing that drives an irreparable stake through the heart of our dreams is giving up.

I need to remember this.

Tomorrow I’m starting a new diet and fitness program. I’ll share the name, but only with the disclaimer that this is not a recommendation or endorsement. It’s called the 21 Day Fix. I’m not a big fan of the name. I’m not a lamp or a car to be fixed. I’m a person who needs some help and support to continue down my path to my weight loss and fitness goals. Even though the program is liberally advertised via infommercials on television, I heard about it via a country music artist named Jo Dee Messina who decided to do the program and started a challenge with her fans on her Facebook page. (You might remember that she was one of the artists on the Country Music Cruise that I went on last January.) Anyway, I heard about it on her page and then, in a strange synchronicity, saw the infommercial while channel surfing. I watched the show — is there anything that Montel Williams won’t hire on to help sell? — and that interested me enough to read more about the program on the web.

I like that the program includes a series of workouts that provide great variety in at-home exercise and each is only 30 minutes long. It also has a sensible eating plan that focuses on eating clean, quality foods in portion controlled balance. The portions and the balance are assisted by a series of colorful containers in different sizes.

Okay, enough about the program itself. Here’s what I find really interesting as I sit here tonight. My mindset and motivation are ramped up like I flicked a switch into the On position.

***** We interrupt this blog post for a commercial distraction. Have you seen the Kohl’s campaign for Find Your Yes? I just saw one filmed from the perspective of an elementary school kid trying to climb up a rope in gym class. It’s enough to give me heart palpitations and flashback to being the fat girl in gym class who couldn’t even pull herself up one foot off of the ground. Thank goodness the Kohl’s ad is a feel-good spot and the kid makes it all of the way up to ring the bell. *****

Now, back to my blog. So, I’ve been struggling for awhile and it all comes back to the mindset. I can do anything if I keep my head in the game and don’t mind-screw myself. I thought about this program for a while before ordering because I worried about whether I was falling into a diet mentality. I finally decided that I could benefit from the structure and the assistance of balance between proteins, carbs, fruits, veggies, and fats. For example, I noticed that it differentiates between fruits and veggies instead of combining them into a single category. It splits up different types of nuts and seeds.

I also like that it shows me how to treat myself a couple of times a week if I really want a glass of wine or a piece of chocolate. By following the instructions, I can substitute and not screw up the plan. It’s a food plan that I can live with and not feel like I’m on a restrictive diet. That is another asset for my mindset.

Earlier tonight, I went to the supermarket and purchased a variety of food items to fit the food plan. I’m going to put together my lunch and snack items before I go to bed so that I’m all prepared. My alarm is set for 6:00 a.m. so that I can do the 30 minute exercise routine before work.

All told, I’m excited about getting started tomorrow. I’m putting behind me the upset and negative thoughts I have about having gained some weight. I had a setback and now I’m setting it aside. Tomorrow is another new day.

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